Star Captain FAQ
Q. What is a star captain?
A. Star captains are men of great heroism, valor, and honor. They bravely destroy space aliens every day so you and I can live in peace.
Q. What does a star captain look like?
A. They usually have stubble. Many star captains also have a square jaw, a helmet, or both. Star captains can be found at the helm of a Fleet Tactical Carrier, or in a cave somewhere killing aliens, or even on
the maintenance deck of their ship, fixing a broken shield generator.
Q. I've never met a star captain. Give me an example of a famous star captain.
A. Roy "Lefty" Phillips, who rescued a space bus full of galaxy infants from a Xyvellian scrap collector, comes to mind. Don't forget his heroic friend,
Rick "Space Nugget" McGreely, who served under
Dirk "Deciduous" Gibbs in the Battle of Ravin IX.
Q. What sort of weapon does a star captain use?
A. Well, Star Captain Dirk "Chigger" Williams made the Flexmatic Tech Beam Rifle famous. His contemporary,
Dirk "Hamstring" McNeil, of course prefers the Fleet Standard Issue Phasetronic Raygun. A true star captain feels comfortable with a whole range of weapons, from Taihatsu Heavy Industries Tech Beam Rifles to Arman PP7000s.
Q. Wow, star captains are really great! Will you tell me all about them?
A. You bet! You can subscribe to the official Star Captains Club of America RSS feed. Every so often, we will
update it with the latest breaking news about our heroes in the sky.
An example of a harrowing tale from the galactic front lines:
The Intergalactic News Service just received a report stating that at 608.7101 Galactic Standard Time, Star Captain Dirk "Planetbarber" Davis, veteran of the Battle of Ravin IX, broke free of an enemy cell to deliver intelligence on the troop movements of the Balsa Pirates! He will receive the Blue Galaxy Award for his ferocious display of patriotism. During the ordeal, Davis was reported to have
used his Walther Reaper with deadly effectiveness. Known to the crew of his Fleet Tactical Carrier simply as
"Planetbarber," Davis is a humble yet intense star captain. His life-long friend and navigator,
Peppy "Trout" McGreely, says this about him: "Planetbarber can do it all. One minute he's fixing a
ionic discharge router, the next he's off fighting Zarvekian Trader-Assassins with his Incam PP7000. He's really
an impressive man, and we're glad that he's at the helm of the F.C.S. Death's Head." The Hegemon will be presenting the award at a formal ceremony next month.
